Lunar Phases

I will be the moon
if you will be the sky around me
holding me up
from the ground

You will let me be full
sometimes
and sometimes new

I know I have only
reflected sunlight
but with you here
I can make my own shine

I will let you be dark
sometimes
but never eclipsed.

~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~

Gravity/Grab At Me

Beloved, you know I find
letting myself
be lov-ed difficult, in part or full

A disclaimer, then, I state:
If I should slip,
trip, I this claim:

I am yours for sunsets
For sunrises, until
after our suns set

When the moon rises
I will rise mooning,
howling love.

For every eclipse, I will
let you eke bliss
out of my heart

The gravity of this love is
for me weightless,
grab at me what it will

For I know I am beloved
sun or moon or none
and vow to be so loved.

~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~

Sad Hurricane

Sad when the hurricane
must make the choice
to censor its howling winds
clip its powerful wings.

And thus fade gracefully
wearing the mantle of normalcy
of love and decency, of shame
oppressive with heated cheeks.

Contrary to accepted legend
there was no temptation or
grand seduction cascading
into the last downfall

Rather a decision to slow down
let human fingers split your storm
shrug off immortal armor
permit mortals to love you

Not as worshipers from afar
prayed and pled at your command
but as equals, or nearly so
this requires a demise of myth

A return, a decrease, a downgrade
a self-desecration traded for love
Will you love the captured whirlwind
once it has lost its powers?

Weep for the hurricane, its eye
has dried its only tears.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~~~~~

Home

Now we have arrived
in this new arrangement
strangeness surrounds us
even as we call it home

unfamiliarity
beats our hearts fast
when the lights are out
when wind roars overhead

infuriates us
looking for the lost
pieces of our old lives
and a new set of keys

drives us mad
dervishes of activity
moving dreamlike through
this odd landscape

And this is what we
came here to find?
What we all search for
it's not elusive at all

linguistically, that is
a few slips, trips of the
old tongue before we manage
to get the words right

tripping over old things
falling onto new floors
falling into new arms
and calling this all
home

~~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~~

Scent Marking

Scent marking
my way into your heart
I believe you may have one
you wear it on your sleeve
with a poker face to match

I can't tell if you can love.
Though really, this nose knows
its owner's heart is often fickle
flitting from fragrance to fragrance
mimicking each shift in the wind

But if my native perfume could
but seep into your veins
hide in your arteries, pump into
that quiet heart of yours
for but one beat, one breath, one life

I will consider myself more fortunate
than any who have gone before.

~~~~~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Left Socks

You make my kitchen a mess
of cooked eggs and
coffee smells

You carelessly leave
CDs and clothes at my place
your scent on my pillow

Every morning it gets longer
the struggle to wake you up
not let you keep your dreamhold

To push us from the
kiss-sleep-kiss-sleep night
into the no-time day

I guess, in the left socks and
left messages, I see love
in the little things

And hear it when you whisper
barely above a sigh
thinking I am quite asleep

~~~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~~~

Hebdomad

The entire world
wants me to think I'm insane
tries to tell me
today is Thursday

That can't be true, I know it
down in the slinky marrow
of my ancestor's bones
in the way the day hangs

loose-fitting like a cloak
like a Friday cape
across my shoulders
tickling my ankles

Also, I know that today
must be Friday, because I love you
and I only love you on Fridays
Thursdays I love music

or art, or sometimes food
Mondays that dog with the curly hair
or the memory of games
played with my sister at age seven

So you see, it can't be Thursday
for I love you, I am sure I do;
I know it in the marrow
coiled asp-like in my bones

Such a deviation would be
impossible and we all know
impossibilities -and dragons-
are reserved for Sundays

Anyway, days do not care a whit
about foolish probabilities
they know that they exist
sense that it is their turn to be today

Hard to slice, cleave, septisect
a circle equally, hard to
break the hebdomad, harder still
if you take more than your share

Leaving none for dance, for cats
cartoon shows and drawing
for zoos and museums
traveling and my black ruffled skirt

And I love you today.
Under a weakening sunset, with
the week-end moon up between clouds
hide-and-seeking its way

into freedom from the urban yoke
So take your one-seventh
and be glad of what you get
Keep Thursday for, to, yourself

...the newspapers too?
The six-o-clock news?
Your three-year-old cousin
Everyone we know?

...Oh dear, this is terrible
the days have switched themselves
And if I give you Thursday too
where will I put cold milk?

Or was it daydreaming or apples
or painting with ink
I've lost my love-schedule
but I love you, so it must

be today, or tomorrow
even yesterday will suffice if
it can be Friday in this bed
in this quiet kingdom of sleep

gently woken by Friday's sun
I have Friday feet on my legs
running to meet you at the door
wrap my Friday fingers in yours

you love me every day (you say)
I suppose I can manage two

~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~

There, I've written a non-explicit, non-bitter love poem. To...no one.

Neatly, like Modern Art

I wanted to be gone
when you came back
wanted to be unavailable
when you called
wanted one thousand ways
to burn you
To pierce you to the quick
until you withered away

I wanted my actions
to spell out revenge
neatly, like modern art
yellow letters on blue sky
to have kissed ten men
or even one or two
to have hate-laughed my way
out of loving you

I wanted to destroy
to feel restless again
slinking and taut
in my own skin
to ease the mask of apathy
let the darkness out
I wanted to whisper
sordid details in your ear

I wanted to be
so many things
heartless, merciless
in the arms of another
when you came back
I would have iron walls
with no gates
would trick you then flick you
out of an embrace

But I forgot love
love is careless and unashamed
frivolous and stubborn
it will not die in winter
it urges me to
set myself aflame
to keep you warm
to stay and not stray

So it's a heaven-sent blessing
that I am deaf and blind
my tongue is leaden
my breath cold and weak
when you come to me
flippant or repentant
bleeding or proud
it will not be long

it will not be long
until you bow your head
before you kneel
crumbling like a weary statue
with snow warping your hands
as you watch me
walk away
swift with the current.

~~~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~~~

Quiet

It is quiet
we don't chatter
compare favorites
find kindred spirits

Enumerate our lives
find meaning
in shaky coincidences
and similar needs

skin met skin
long before we knew each other
soul met soul
long before we liked each other

This connection
is instinctual
completely
visceral

you made me boneless
shocked me with warmth
you woke me up
forced me to feel

~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~

Stay the Night

Stay the night
push sleep away with me
throw foggy fingers into thick air
make a mess of dust particles

Stay the night
punch pillows into submission
scrape nails against shins
rub heels and arches and souls

Stay the night
tug on tangled hair
weave and un-weave hands and feet
knot ligaments and interlock bones

Stay the night
wrinkle sheets with shared dreams
brush accidental kisses to skin
churn and settle until golden and sated

Stay the night
shudder the earth and echo the mountains
rival the falling of stars
merge halves of wholes into one

Stay the night...

only, don't.

~~~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~~~

I can't really say why I am so pleased with this; just know, reader, that I am. Written in an insanely short amount of time. About fifteen minutes, in fact. It shows, doesn't it? Ah, well. Forget you!

Go on, wake up your demons! It'll be fun! <-- Still More Verse

This Heaviest of Freedoms

I. Walkabout

I removed the gold chain from around my neck. The one that holds
an inscribed half-heart and a ring.

How many times have I traced the jagged edge of that divided charm?

I seem to have swallowed all the bitter words
I never got a chance to throw at you.

I have them sitting in my stomach, a dense mass of letters
flavored with an angry tone.

I hear every sound from the distance of the top of a high dive.
But I've already plunged, so it must be the water that clogs my ears.

I smile and make dinner, I laugh and play the part.

I am either the world's best actress, the world's coldest lover, or the world's biggest fool.

Then again, maybe it's the way I'm screaming inside, so loudly,
that makes everything echo from far away.

I know I'm crazy.

I may call you again. I may love you again.

It was your turn to chase me. (The way it always will be.) Maybe I finally tired you out. Maybe I finally drove you away.

And to think, I was holding back.

I don't feel any of that lightness I thought I would feel, bubbling up inside me, lifting my burden.

I was probably wrong.

I am definitely cruel.

I am too strong for my own good.

I think you got off easy. I think you're the lucky one.
I think I let fear call the shots. (I thought too much.)

I twisted the passages from my heart to my mind one too many times.
They are the thinnest of straws leaking precious emotion.

I think this may be as happy as I get.

Why am I so weighed down by this heaviest of freedoms?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

II. Boomerang

You made sure your mother called
to tell me about the emergency.

The medium is in the hospital. The one who talks to ghosts,
who said I was beautiful outside and in.

(You see why I was skeptical?)

I did the unthinkable - ran away. But you didn't even know
I had left you.

I am torn between frustration and relief.

It's the little things that always pull you back, the
gossamer-thin spider webs that we have erected between us.

I hate the distance, those glorious mountains and the oceans laced with salt.

I hate the unfairness inherent in the distribution of resources.

More than anything, I hate my fickle, cold-blooded heart.

The same one that catches in my throat when I reach for my necklace
and find only unbroken skin.

Thin strands of gold lie in a resentful pile on my dresser.
We never did write our names on the back of that charm.

I called you. Dodged your lazy bullet questions.

I gave you an in.

I both hope and dread you will take it.

I could never sell my soul for a kiss, but I'd buy yours.

Keep it in a vial around my neck.

Wear it as a shawl, a blanket, to save myself from the frost.
(How do you stay so warm?)

Run it up a flagpole, sew it into my pocket, prick it, cure it, love it, destroy it.

Melt it and mold it into a key for these fetters.

Open me up again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~AEW~~~~~
Words are kisses are swords, striking from within... <-- More Poetry

I Know

Your words flow
as grenadine down
my spine
flirt with my
smooth lines and
new tattoo.

Somehow your kisses
breathe warmth and
radiate life.
Come and worship
this temple body
of mine.

I promise you
your skin is as
soft as mink;
as smooth as
ripe rose petals
of shining bronze.

My head pressed
against your
treasured chest
I listen to you,
the rumbling of
your voice

In a fugue with
the strongest
heartbeat
I have ever known.
I know this,
this pose...

I notice now
how your strength
is so gentle,
how your lips
hold my kisses
like precious gems.

How you marvel
at the many colors
in my hair
and your unabashed
gaze holds love
behind each eyelash.

I know this,
this love...

~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~
Rhyme Me, Baby! <-- More Poems

We

We sleep
tangled feet
arms and hair
thrown in every direction

I beat
the air
with my fists
tossing and turning

Your hand lifts
a father's fingers
calm a restless child
a lover's whispers
soothe my aching mind

Every day I find another
corner of your heart
that holds my face
and bears my mark

I never knew how
deeply I wrote
myself
into your life
How intertwined
our stories were

until you gave
me your all
wrapped up
in one
neat, shiny band...
I'm yours.

You sleep
and I count a
lullaby
in your heartbeats

My weak pulse
always fades
but yours just may
steal my breath away

We sleep...
~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~

Oh, you! You are so aubade!<-- More Poems