Get this one thing clear:
You do not read love poems
and I most certainly
do not write them
None of this has happened
you did not kiss the yawns
out from beneath my ribs
I did not thread your hair with mine
I know this in the way
your shirt molds to my skin
how I miss the weight when it's gone
and your skittering gaze
You know this in the way
you refuse to keep quiet
lie still and let me
trace your topography
I need the distraction of guilt
to make it look like it should
but you have lust
which is more (than) real?
~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~
Oh my gosh! Who's like, your fave sonneteer? <-- More Rhymes
Monday 24 April 2006
Tuesday 18 April 2006
Flirt, Flirt, Extrovert...
When you gonna learn // to button your skirt?
Emblem and I booked our flights to Dublin (and back), and from Dublin to Edinburgh and back again. We'll leave late on the 8th of May and come back on the 22nd. We'll thus spend the first week driving around Ireland, and the second week using public systems in Scotland.
Woohoo!
H. got internet in his house, the Fire Dog left NO, freeing up LizArd, and all of this just makes me want to hide from all messenger programs for a while. I won't, though. Cuz I'm GOOD that way. (In case you couldn't tell, I'm feeling a tad bit off-of-sane today.) Good for you, reader, in that you get to (re)meet my subconscious. Bad for you, in that I will either ignore punctuation or throw in lots of semicolons, colons, parentheses, and all manner of grammar most unnecessary (that's the first freaking time I've spelled that word correctly on the first try (see, parentheses (OMG, meta! meta! META! Can you handle it?))).
Other news - I'm still looking for a new muse, and am now accepting c.v.s. No résumés, only c.v.s. Um, also? I just decided I'm a leeeetle too crazed to finish this post. Chau Chau For Now!
Current Soundtrack: "Little Hands" by Duncan Sheik from his self-titled album.
Quote Trapped in My Head: "Her indifference fills the room // Some weak seduction on the morning after // How it slays me every time I touch her // But she just wants to sleep." - from aforementioned "Little Hands".
What I Learned Today: All hope may not be lost for my 3d project. Also, I see movies in my head.
Emblem and I booked our flights to Dublin (and back), and from Dublin to Edinburgh and back again. We'll leave late on the 8th of May and come back on the 22nd. We'll thus spend the first week driving around Ireland, and the second week using public systems in Scotland.
Woohoo!
H. got internet in his house, the Fire Dog left NO, freeing up LizArd, and all of this just makes me want to hide from all messenger programs for a while. I won't, though. Cuz I'm GOOD that way. (In case you couldn't tell, I'm feeling a tad bit off-of-sane today.) Good for you, reader, in that you get to (re)meet my subconscious. Bad for you, in that I will either ignore punctuation or throw in lots of semicolons, colons, parentheses, and all manner of grammar most unnecessary (that's the first freaking time I've spelled that word correctly on the first try (see, parentheses (OMG, meta! meta! META! Can you handle it?))).
Other news - I'm still looking for a new muse, and am now accepting c.v.s. No résumés, only c.v.s. Um, also? I just decided I'm a leeeetle too crazed to finish this post. Chau Chau For Now!
Wednesday 12 April 2006
Holy Week
Sunday I will go astray,
one of those
early morning sins
meant to fill single hours
with more than hollow half-light
We shall surpass Judas
betrayal is
a fuck-and-kiss
Monday we yearn
Tuesday I doubt:
"Are you a religious freak?"
Ritual is a comfort
a necessary cloak
with guilt for a dagger; a
parrot-bright serape
for a burial shroud
Wednesday we see red
lining our vision
drying on yellow tiles
slicking our thighs
riding high on the
cheekbones of the mirror
fading to pale
as we know what we've done
Maundy Thursday, if you
linger by the Lillies
they will paint you yellow, a
leopard ripping pistals
in the greenhouse
We will with indifferent harmony
sing out coded confessions
with a perfume-laden throat
But Friday, love, Friday
Good Friday will burn
I will hold a candle
with trembling hands
flinching before the cross
quartered by spears
rejoicing at the weight
of an empty heart
There is no word
for Saturday's part
between death and life
fear, despair, hope, and joy
"Will you not keep vigil?"
with Marys - Hail or Hated
changing to banshees at night
back to nuns by sunrise
Sunday we feast
on heaps of coal and honey-skin
and wonder: why the fuss?
women in black wailing,
disciples with no faith
We have yeast and sex
Hope is easy, once
we've memorized The End
~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~
I heard occasional poems were on backorder this month... <-- More Poetry
one of those
early morning sins
meant to fill single hours
with more than hollow half-light
We shall surpass Judas
betrayal is
a fuck-and-kiss
Monday we yearn
Tuesday I doubt:
"Are you a religious freak?"
Ritual is a comfort
a necessary cloak
with guilt for a dagger; a
parrot-bright serape
for a burial shroud
Wednesday we see red
lining our vision
drying on yellow tiles
slicking our thighs
riding high on the
cheekbones of the mirror
fading to pale
as we know what we've done
Maundy Thursday, if you
linger by the Lillies
they will paint you yellow, a
leopard ripping pistals
in the greenhouse
We will with indifferent harmony
sing out coded confessions
with a perfume-laden throat
But Friday, love, Friday
Good Friday will burn
I will hold a candle
with trembling hands
flinching before the cross
quartered by spears
rejoicing at the weight
of an empty heart
There is no word
for Saturday's part
between death and life
fear, despair, hope, and joy
"Will you not keep vigil?"
with Marys - Hail or Hated
changing to banshees at night
back to nuns by sunrise
Sunday we feast
on heaps of coal and honey-skin
and wonder: why the fuss?
women in black wailing,
disciples with no faith
We have yeast and sex
Hope is easy, once
we've memorized The End
~~~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~~~
I heard occasional poems were on backorder this month... <-- More Poetry
Tuesday 11 April 2006
Read it Here First
What follows is a news update on the activities and whereabouts of Mandala.
So, I returned from New Orleans on the 1st, very late at night, kept Emblem and Sarsie up for hours, and still managed to get up to go to church and sing in the choir that same morning. Then, everyone abandoned me (the rents to CT, Emblem to the Big City), and I breathed a sigh of relief to be home.
NO was fun, depressing, relaxing, and interesting. Meica and I took 395 pictures. That's why no one has seen any yet.
On the 5th I had my first dance lessons - Introduction II Rhythm and Introduction II Smooth - and did NOT get lost on my way to Hackensack.
Pezzo (yay, Pezzo!) came to visit on the 7th, after much trouble on his part - ask him about his drive, then duck - and I had to wait at the end of my street to flag him down. My house is very out of the way, no?
Went to the dentist Sat. morning, got a cryptic message from H., the rents came home, we picked up mom's peluca, and went to dinner. Pezzo, good job making nice with the older generation.
We watched MST 3000, played NES, and eventually settled down to watch TLOTR: The Fellowship of the Ring way too late at night to be healthy.
It was a very low-key weekend, all told, due in part to the rain and hail - kept us from going to the park - and in part to sleepiness.
Got up again early to go to choir, remembered I was the Lay Reader when I got there. Palm Sunday, Hosanna, etc., back home. Pezzo's car needed yet another jump before he could start off, then he went too far on the Thruway, had to hit a U-ie. Meanwhile, I slept in my cozy little bed from 18:00 to 22:30, woke up, worked on the compu, ate, felt sick, went to sleep at 2:15. Sigh.
Tonight I'm looking forward to dinner with my girls! Woohoo 'Lex and L.B.!
Momentary Soundtrack: "Thick" by Tonic off of Lemon Parade.
Quote Trapped in My Head: "I have passed the test. I will diminish, and go into the West, and remain Galadriel." - Galadriel, from The Fellowship of the Ring.
What I Learned Today: The tale of Tam O' Shanter.
So, I returned from New Orleans on the 1st, very late at night, kept Emblem and Sarsie up for hours, and still managed to get up to go to church and sing in the choir that same morning. Then, everyone abandoned me (the rents to CT, Emblem to the Big City), and I breathed a sigh of relief to be home.
NO was fun, depressing, relaxing, and interesting. Meica and I took 395 pictures. That's why no one has seen any yet.
On the 5th I had my first dance lessons - Introduction II Rhythm and Introduction II Smooth - and did NOT get lost on my way to Hackensack.
Pezzo (yay, Pezzo!) came to visit on the 7th, after much trouble on his part - ask him about his drive, then duck - and I had to wait at the end of my street to flag him down. My house is very out of the way, no?
Went to the dentist Sat. morning, got a cryptic message from H., the rents came home, we picked up mom's peluca, and went to dinner. Pezzo, good job making nice with the older generation.
We watched MST 3000, played NES, and eventually settled down to watch TLOTR: The Fellowship of the Ring way too late at night to be healthy.
It was a very low-key weekend, all told, due in part to the rain and hail - kept us from going to the park - and in part to sleepiness.
Got up again early to go to choir, remembered I was the Lay Reader when I got there. Palm Sunday, Hosanna, etc., back home. Pezzo's car needed yet another jump before he could start off, then he went too far on the Thruway, had to hit a U-ie. Meanwhile, I slept in my cozy little bed from 18:00 to 22:30, woke up, worked on the compu, ate, felt sick, went to sleep at 2:15. Sigh.
Tonight I'm looking forward to dinner with my girls! Woohoo 'Lex and L.B.!
Monday 3 April 2006
New Orleans Lost
Man-boys like you
are the reason I have stria
where nothing should be
"Mama, girl, one fine lady,
won't you be my baby?"
Do not talk to me
Map in my waistband
sweat on my back
y hoy día no hablo inglés para nadie
I need to b-
"aby, don't walk away.
You're a pretty flower
you'll melt in the sun
without my sweet love"
Do not talk to me
tripping over dead cats
skipping with bloody feet
sunburned cheeks smile
dust too dry to blink my skies
It is cold on this corner
where the sun refuses to
throw shadows
even for the flies
I need to c-
"ome back, pretty,
I want to walk you down
to my bed, we can sleep under stars
on my front step"
All is not lost
just a girl
in this new New Orleans
the both of us toxic
Trying to be your promised land
~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~
are the reason I have stria
where nothing should be
"Mama, girl, one fine lady,
won't you be my baby?"
Do not talk to me
Map in my waistband
sweat on my back
y hoy día no hablo inglés para nadie
I need to b-
"aby, don't walk away.
You're a pretty flower
you'll melt in the sun
without my sweet love"
Do not talk to me
tripping over dead cats
skipping with bloody feet
sunburned cheeks smile
dust too dry to blink my skies
It is cold on this corner
where the sun refuses to
throw shadows
even for the flies
I need to c-
"ome back, pretty,
I want to walk you down
to my bed, we can sleep under stars
on my front step"
All is not lost
just a girl
in this new New Orleans
the both of us toxic
Trying to be your promised land
~~~~~~AEW~~~~~~
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